Never Buy a Car from a Shaman by Andrew Boulton

By Amanda Saint 3 months ago1 Comment
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Never Buy a Car from a Shaman

Andrew Boulton

 

Because my dad’s an idiot, he bought my car from the shaman.

Now, as well as smelling like a pond’s arsehole, whenever I press in the cigarette lighter, Tom Hanks appears in the passenger seat.

I was into it at first, because it was a young Tom Hanks and we did some kissing and he’d tell me about celebrities who were shitty.

But then, don’t ask me why, he started telling me to run people down. Once he tried to grab the wheel.

I know I could just stop pressing in the cigarette lighter. But really, what would that solve.

 

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About the author: Andrew Boulton is a creative advertising lecturer and copywriter from Nottingham.

If you’ve enjoyed Andrew’s story, please leave a comment below letting him know!
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About

 Amanda Saint

  (257 articles)

Amanda is a novelist, short story writer and features journalist who started Retreat West in 2012.

One Comment

  • Thea Holly says:

    This is the story that I voted for. I was drawn to its quirkiness – a great read. So delighted that it won – a well deserved winner. Hope to read more of his work.

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